Tenth Veteran's Day

Today marks the 10th Veteran's Day we have celebrated since you have been gone. It is bittersweet to say the least. I am so very proud of the young man and Marine you became and there isn't a moment that I am taking a breath that I do not miss you and long to see your face and kiss your forehead. I know that isn't going to be possible until I join you in heaven so for now your pictures and memories will have to do. I did try to reach out to all the Veterans I know or have numbers or emails for and thank them for their service. I've had many text messages or emails from people telling me they are thinking about us today. Nothing will ever make any day easier, but knowing people will never forget you sure does help get to the next day without you. It is hard to even believe that in 20 days you will have been gone from this earth for TEN YEARS! It doesn't seem possible that I have been able to survive for ten years without you. It's only been by the grace of God that I have. I miss you and everything about you. I was organizing your closet yesterday and I came across a letter you wrote to me when you were 13 years old. You were apologizing for having an attitude with me and for not keeping up your grades. Yes, I cried, but I also smiled as that is the young man I wanted you to be. You always made me proud and even when you were being a little turd, I was still proud. I think more than anything when you were younger I was always proud of what I knew you would be. You did not disappoint. Some people have asked me in the past if I had any regrets. My only regret is that I did not get more time with you. I regret not getting to see you fulfill your dream of being a police officer or see you become a daddy. Those are the types of things I regret. I will live the rest of my days wishing for those things all the while knowing it will never be. I love you, son. I miss you, son. Those two things will never change regardless of how long the Lord keeps me on this earth. Love, Momma Bear