This may come across as a pity party and maybe in some ways it could be, but it's hard enough living this life with a huge hole in my heart, but to add defeat to that makes it nearly impossible to deal with. You know how it feels when you truly try to do things to help others and make life easier/better for the people you love just to realize that anything you do (or don't do) will not make them happy.
There is not nor has it ever been an intent to do anything negative to anyone I love in the actions I take. The only intent I have and do have is to be proactive and helpful whether it be long term or short term. Maybe there are just people in this world that cannot or choose to not be happy or just assume ill intent. That saddens me to no end.
This life, as so many of us know, is short and we are not guaranteed tomorrow. Why can't people just love and respect each other rather than immediately think that there is something sinister in people's actions. Not everyone is out to cheat or do ill towards you. There is a such thing as asking someone what their intent was versus just assuming bad intent.
Enough said for me today. I'm just feeling extremely defeated and I know this too shall pass, but what a crappy feeling until it finally does. I would really like my faith in humanity to be restored and just when I think things are getting better something ridiculous happens to squash that feeling. Nice way to start another week.
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